“I Gave You a Part of Me That I Knew You Could Break—What did you do?” With a stick, he wrote this on the soil below his feet. He sat on the rock at the top of the small hill, surrounded by multiple hills and valleys. The location had a serene hue blanketed with a soon to end dusk. Alama’s gaze was fixed, moist and tired. It was blank, inspite of all the earthy colours around in the entire valley. He was not sure if he wanted the time to stop or pass away into future as early as possible. A part of him was thinking of the past and a part of him wanted to forget the past and escape into the future. A part of him was dead and a part of him wanted to live, again. The WORLD he knew was never his. He never felt one with that WORLD. His knowledge of The WORLD around him and his feelings of The WORLD around him, never seems to be in any harmony. Why? He could never understand why he was like that. Was he from The WORLD? Sometimes, for some, the pain of some early-on heartbreak will often cling tenaciously to their hope that perhaps someday the object of their desire will be forthcoming. But there are others who, in the aftermath of their early-on heartbreak, will find themselves withdrawing completely from the world of objects—their heart shattered… And then there are some who carry on with this shattered heart, without even knowing what and why the heart feels shattered. They keep looking for their world with this lonely feeling. Pain, struggle and a journey full of heaviness and sadness. And sometimes they come across someone or something, that makes them feel that they have someone whom they feel as part of their world. Alama realized how he was almost getting to be in terms with the life in The WORLD inspite of all the challenges of chronic feelings of being an outsider in The WORLD. He had accepted his world as different from The WORLD and that he was lonely in that. He understood that he had to become a part of The WORLD, but on his own terms. He knew how his world was different from The WORLD. He was wise not to expect things from The WORLD. But he did not realize that in the efforts to become a part of The WORLD, he started feeling The WORLD as his own world. He started shedding his protective cover. He became vulnerable. He started trusting that The WORLD would not hurt him again. He forgot that his heart was already shattered. He forgot he was not part of The WORLD. Once again, shattered, defeated, betrayed, insulted, taken for granted and dumped. Deja vu? He wrote once again on the moist earth and teary eyes and a gloomy feeling of helplessness; “I Gave You a Part of Me That I Knew You Could Break—And you broke it!” Still sitting on the same stone, oblivious of his surroundings, he realized that it has actually happened many times. Multiple times. Its not déjà vu. Why is he not learning? Why is he not changing? Why does he keep making efforts in a vain hope? Is he in a fantasy world and not ready to open his eyes to reality? “Sometimes, for some, the pain of some early-on heartbreak will often cling tenaciously to their hope that perhaps someday the object of their desire will be forthcoming and trust worthy.” He had the answer!!! He was not part of The WORLD. He was different. He can be a part of The WORLD but can not become one of them. Never! He was Alama ! He can only join hearts not shatter them. He can only give and forgive. He was Alama. He was meant to be eternally hopeful that some day, The WORLD would be like him. He is hope and hope only! He suddenly realized that the earth was moist again. Not from his tears but from the early dawn due drops. He was ready once again to be hopeful. He was ready once again to trust. He was ready once again to be Alama, inspite of being alone in The WORLD. He took a small stone and wrote on the moist big stone on which he had spent the entire night. “I Gave You a Part of Me That I Knew You Could Break—But you could not!” I am Alama I am fine Monu